IWSG: Don't Stop Believing

The first Wednesday of every month is Insecure Writers Support Group Be sure to stop by and lend your support to the other writers participating!

I decided to go back to Book #1 for yet another rewrite. I am plagued with the idea that maybe I'm wasting my time.

I finished a book I love a couple months ago. I wrote it with such ease and I love the finished product. It needs some work, of course, but overall, I feel like it was a huge victory for me. It was the first NEW book I wrote in years, and it felt liberating and amazing.

Why, then, would I go back to the book I've been writing for upwards of 8 years, on and off? The book that has caused me so much stress and anger and frustration and pain? The book that has seen at least 10 different rewrites and is STILL not all it could be?

It's a waste of time, right?

But the thing is...I can't give up on it. With my newest book, I learned things about myself. I learned to be a better writer, a more confident writer. I believe I can finally give the characters in that first book the story they deserve. And, in the words of the incomparable Journey, "Don't Stop Believing."

So, back to the drawing board, I go.

Will this be the time that I finally get it right?

What about you? Have you ever worked on the same project for years and years? How did it turn out? Do you ever feel like you should just give it up?

Winter, Puppies and Rewrites, Oh My!

I know that when I have the urge to start all my blog posts with, "I know it's been a while, but I'm still alive,"it means that I suck at this blogging thing. THIS time, though, I have good excuses...er...reasons.

I have been writing. A lot.

Okay, currently, I'm stalled on Chapter Seventeen, but I've written a metric crap ton of words since the last post. Granted, around 85% of those words are collecting dust in a file titled "Misc. Pieces," but I wrote 'em, dammit!

I probably would be much further along, but this happened:

Meet Luca, the newest member of our family. She's a Jack Russell mix that we adopted from our local Humane Society about a month ago. Don't let that sweet face fool you. Satan lives inside that pup.

Ever since we brought her home, my writing time has become wrangling the puppy, making sure she doesn't poo on the rug or torture the cats too much, time (let it be known that I have failed at one or more of those things on a many occasions. Potty training a puppy in the winter is HARD!).

Things are getting easier now that we've adjusted to basically having a toddler running through the house. Let me tell you, it doesn't matter just HOW clean you think your house is, a puppy will set you straight in a heartbeat. I don't even know where she finds the things she chews on!

On the writing front, now that I've adjusted to the pup, I have written two chapters and rewritten the same chapter about five times. I'm tackling that chapter again this afternoon before I head to work and crossing my fingers that this is it. Wish me luck.

I've also submitted five chapters to my writing group for our next meeting. The other ladies are otherwise occupied with various writing tasks (and making lots of progress!), so I'm the only one turning in pages this month. It's sort of nerve wracking to have all the attention on me and what may or may not be some good shit. Even so, I'm looking forward to their thoughts. I'm actually very excited about some of those chapters.

I think I'm onto something good with this story, after a bajillion years writing it. It feels good. Really good. And scary as hell.

Anyway, how have YOU been? Getting lots of writing done? Are you surviving this horrible winter?

Split Personalities

Three things occurred to me when I woke up this morning. The first being that it's Saturday, the second that I have the day off and the third that it's sun-shiny gorgeous outside. This should automatically imply that I'll be doing something involving soaking up the rays. I might go bike shopping, since I've wanted a bike for a while now and I have a little extra cash with which to purchase one. Other than that, I have no plans. Zip, zilch, zero.

Which means I should either be writing or reading. I started Water For Elephants two weeks ago and just made it to the third chapter. Not for any other reason that I haven't found the time. I've been trying to write as much as possible. It's almost certain that I won't make my 30k goal by the end of the month. That is, after all, about 15k in three days. I've taken the pressure off myself though. I've been getting about a thousand words written pretty regularly each day, almost two thousand on Thursday. I'm trucking along. My story is making progress, though not as quickly as I'd like. But I'll reach the end...eventually.

I've got split personalities when it comes to editing this massive piece of word vomit. Part of me is like a child on Christmas morning -- jumping up and down with excitement to get my hands on that red (yes, I actually edit in red) pen. The other part of me is dragging her feet, afraid of the mess that I'm going to find. It's going to take forever to fix the plot holes and weak characters and awkward dialogue and flat writing that is this novel. And I've never done a full, all the way through, edit. I'm usually the kind of person who writes a couple chapters, then goes back and rewrites what doesn't work. The downfall to this method is that I get so caught up in making these chapters bright and shiny that I don't write any further. I did this with two other novels I started -- one of which is three years in progress. With this one, I want to finish it, to get to the end, then go back and make it pretty. And it's going to take a lot to make this one pretty.

I'm scared.

Anyway, it's now early afternoon and I'm still in my PJs, so I'm gonna get my day started. Hope everyone has a super Saturday!