Filtering by Tag: mental breakdown

I Think My Brain's Busted

It's October 2nd. I should be a frantic, frenzied mess. I should be maniacally revising my WiP and working on an outline for NaNoWriMo. I should be freaking out.

But I'm not.

No, instead I'm spending ridiculous amounts of time dallying around on the internet and playing Sims. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???

I think I'm having a mental breakdown. No, really. I'm serious. What other reason would I be so...unfocused?

I really need to get it together. I've got less than a month before the absolutely insane four weeks in November. The only saving grace I have is that I know the story I'm gonna be working on. I know it and its characters well. I just have to rework it and make it stronger and more...logical. Just an outline. That's all I need. Usually, when I'm starting a new project, I need an outline, character interviews, page after page of notes and research. But not this time. Just an outline. Maybe that's why I'm being so nonchalant. I think I've got it under control because I've been working on this story for so long. I'm not taking into account that whatever I've got written for it (an entire word-vomit of a first draft, written from too many POVs and filled with purple prose) is useless. Everything has to go. I have to start anew. I need to hammer that concept into my thick head. Maybe then I'll be good and motivated.

Or at least I hope so.

I leave for work in about twenty minutes. It's going to be a long, hectic day. I wasted three hours this morning doing nothing of importance when I could have gotten a lot accomplished. All day, I'm gonna kick myself for that. And all day, I'm going to remind myself that I've got a lot of work ahead of me. Maybe by the time I get out, I'll be motivated with just the right dash of freaking out.

So, how about you? Am I the only one who's so daggone unmotivated? How do you get past this?